Merry Christmas, My Cunning Stunt 🎄

Verse 1
Snow on the roof and gin in my cup,
You’re my festive chaos, you light me up,
From Cunny Funt to Sunning Ctunt (oops, behave!),
You’re the naughtiest gift Santa ever gave.

You sparkle brighter than tinsel strung,
With a laugh that’s sharp and a wicked tongue,
My Cunning Stunt, my festive flame,
Every silent night just moans your name.

Chorus
So Merry Kissmas, my Cunning Stunt,
You naughty tease, my winter want,
You’re my sleigh ride, my mistletoe craze,
My frosty flirt in a Yorkshire haze!

From baubles bright to stocking plump,
Here’s to my cheeky Cunning Stunt —
May your turkey be moist and your prosecco blunt,
And your Christmas wild with your loving… punt 😏

Verse 2
We’ll roast the chestnuts, pop the cork,
You’ll whisper filth over pigs and pork,
With a Fanny Cunt and a Bunter Hall,
We’ll deck these halls and scandalise all.

Your grin’s more cheek than a mince pie slice,
You’re naughty, nice and twice as spice,
My seasonal sin, my misty flaunt,
My red-hot Yule log… Cunning Stunt.

Bridge
Let the carolers sing and the neighbours stare,
As we shake the snow from your knickers fair,
A bit of tinsel, a velvet taunt,
All wrapped up in my Cunning Stunt.

Final Chorus
So Merry Kissmas, my Cunning Stunt,
You sugarplum vixen, my tipsy punt,
Cheers to laughter, lust and gin,
To rude remarks and festive sin.

If Santa’s checking naughty or nice,
We tipped the scale — and rolled it twice,
So here’s to you, you saucy front,
My forever festive Cunning Stunt